Carrying the Torch for Comedy

In case you haven’t been paying attention for the last 16 years, NBC has had broadcast rights to the Olympics (excluding the ’94 and ’94 Winter Games). Cross-promotion is in full effect even in years when there are no Olympics (I’m guessing those are the Olympic rings permanently affixed to the NBC on-air bug).

But during the games, it’s a bit different. Usually, NBC will pick one show (most of the time, a comedy), and run commercials that are actually, not annoying. To wit, the following promo has been running this summer where Michael Scott says what everyone thinks about beach volleyball:

It looks like there are only a handful of The Office Olympic promos, which is a shame, because The Office creative staff can do some pretty funny stuff.

The best set of Olympic promos came out in ’92, when NBC enlisted the cast of Seinfeld to…um, carry the torch.

They’re not on YouTube, but transcripts are available on Usenet (remember that, kiddies). Here are some of the highlights:

Jerry sitting by his computer in his apartment.
Jerry: Do you know the correct pronunciation of Barcelona is actually
       Barthelona?  That’s because, many years ago, the King of Spain
       spoke with a lisp and the members of the court, trying to curry
       favor with the King, adopted his unusual speech pattern.  Absolutely
       true.  Just a piece of Olympic trivia for you.  I’m Jerry Theinfeld.  

Jerry interviewing a gymnast, with the Olympic rings and the NBC logo
in the background.
Jerry:  I’m here with 8 year old Kathy Kwan, star of the gymnastic
        team.  You must be looking forward to the games, Kathy.
Kathy:  Yes, those games are very special to me.  As I will retire
        when they’re over.
Jerry:  Retire?  You’re kidding.
Kathy:  I’m not 6 anymore.  Besides you have to give those
        youngsters a chance to make their mark.  
Jerry:  What are your plans for the future?
Kathy:  I like to spend more time with my parents and watch them
        grow up.

Jerry and George in the Cafe.  
Jerry:     Pass the cream, George.
The guy with the torch runs comes in.
George:    Hey, look.
Torch Guy: Hi, maybe you can help me, I’m lost.  Do either of you know
           the way to Barcelona from here?
Jerry:     Well, I’d take the West Side Highway to the Cross Bronx.
George:    Hold, Hold.  What are you nuts, at this time of the day.  Listen
           to me.  Take the FDR to the Major Deagan.
Jerry:     What are you talking about, the FDR is under construction.
George:    He’s running.

For a script of all the Seinfeld Olympic Promos, visit this page from the alt.tv.seinfeld archive.

Drunken Irabu Beats Up Bartender and I Reap the Rewards

I know I’m a day late with this, but former Yankee hurler Hideki Irabu has been arrested in Japan for drunkenly beating up a bartender.  Or beating up a bartender drunkenly.  The key points of this story: he was drunk, and he beat up a bartender (not to mention downing 20 mugs of beer and afterwards, paying for the damage).  From Yankee Blogger Pete Abraham:

Former New York Yankees pitcher Hideki Irabu was arrested Wednesday for allegedly assaulting a bartender after drinking 20 mugs of beer, a police official said.Irabu, 39, became angered after his credit card was rejected. He then allegedly pushed the bartender against the wall, pulled his hair and smashed at least nine liquor bottles at a bar in Osaka, western Japan, a police official said on condition of anonymity, citing department policy.

The bartender sustained no injuries. Irabu paid the bill with another credit card. The police official said Irabu admitted the assault.

I feel compelled to report this because I sponsor Irabu’s Baseball Reference page, and have noticed a slight uptick in the number of visitors in the past day. 

As noted on the page, I still have two Irabu t-shirts (but I don’t remember the last time I wore either). The New York Times tried to check in with Irabu a few months ago, and I wrote about it here.

The System Is Down

This afternoon, upon returning to to work from my Hour of Me, something was awry- the e-mail server was down.  No one could send or receive e-mails.  If you wanted to talk to a co-worker, you had to call them, or (gasp!) walk to their office.

I have to admit, it was a very productive few hours.  Of course, when the system came back up (with just a half-hour to go in the day), I was slammed with requests to do (whatever) now.

After experiencing an e-mail blackout for a few hours, I wouldn’t mind, maybe once a month, a whole day of not having e-mail.  It would allow me to catch up on all the little things that immediate communication puts a damper on.  Of course, the next day, I’d probably need another catch-up day to go through all the e-mail I missed the day before.

If You're Going to the Ohio State Fair

Do yourselves a favor and get a porkburger (or as they call it, “The Other Burger”).  Easily beats the pants off of corn dogs, turkey legs, ears of corn, funnel cakes or any other type of fair food.

Had to work there again for a few days this year, and it was a bit underwhelming.  There wasn’t a governor going down the giant slide, nor was a woman asking me to get her dying husband into the free Grand Funk concert.

But considering it’s been hot and is supposed to get hotter, I’m glad my fair days are over for this year.