Author: King Tom

The city that never stops talking about baseball

I moved to Columbus from the NY-NJ area almost eight years ago. While I like Columbus, there are some things I miss about my native land, to wit:

  • Good Chinese food
  • Edible Pizza
  • Restaurants open past 10 p.m.
  • The Yankees
  • Year-round baseball coverage in the media

That last one has hit home over the past few weeks. Here in Columbus, people are abuzz about the local college football team, but my level of interest in college football is nil.

While the baseball playing season has been over for more than a month, plenty has happened, epecially for the Yankees. They let Joe Torre walk and hired Joe Girardi. Alex Rodriguez left the Yankees then came back. The talk over the last week has been about which team the Twins would trade Johan Santana to. And this week, team executives met in Nashville for the winter meetings.

But it’s being ignored here.

Actually, Peter Abraham, a Yankees beat writer with an excellent blog, summed up the situation in NY last week:

Nobody talks football once the games are over. We know nothing much about 85 percent of the players and not even the best fan could name all of the GMs. But even a casual baseball fan can list four prospects his team could trade for Santana. Or has an opinion on A-Rod.

It must drive the NFL, NBA and NHL people nuts to flip on the radio at 4 p.m. on a late November day and hear nothing but talk about whether Minnesota will trade the lefty. But that is what makes our sport the best. It never goes out of season. They just stop the games for a few months.

Well, at least I have the Internet.

King Tom

Make some other type of small talk, please

At work, I’m responsible for dealing with a large piece of office equipment manufactured by a company that I won’t name, but their company name begins and ends with the same letter. Anyway, when there’s a problem with the machine, I call the company’s (let’s just call them Company X) support line.

A little more than a year ago, Company X outsourced their support staff to somewhere in the Caribbean. I don’t remember exactly where, although I was told once and I do remember that it’s one of the places mentioned in the worst song ever.

Anyway, it’s pretty obvious that Company X’s customer service reps are still working on conversational English. During lulls in the call (when they have to wait for their computers to pull up records or whatever) they will often engage in a line of small talk:

-How are you?
-How is the weather?

Every time I call, they ask these questions. And not wanting to be rude, I engage them in conversation, and will often ask these very same questions back to them. Except the answer to question number two is always “Oh, sunny and in the 80s.” Usually, I don’t mind. But I had to call this week, and when my answer to that question is “cloudy and damn cold,” the very last thing I want to hear back is “Oh, here, it’s sunny and in the 80s.”

Someone should tell Company X to change the script.

King Tom

Knee Deep In The Hoopla

The other night, I was watching one of my favorite shows on the television, VH1 Classic’s We are the 80s. The video for Starship’s We Built This City came on, and while watching it, I noticed something disturbing.

And I don’t mean the fact that I was watching the video for We Built This City.

Anyway, during the video, the band is playing the song for a group of diverse young people. As they play, lights flash and the band and audience are transported to various places in America, including, the Lincoln Memorial:

Say you don't care who goes to that kind of place.

And we go to a close-up of Honest Abe’s memorial:

Say you don't know me or recognize my face.

And then, all of a sudden lights flash, Abe springs to life and starts to dance:

Marconi plays the mamba.

BUT WAIT!

Is it me, or does that look nothing like Lincoln?

Here’s another look of the memorial come to life:

Looking for America, coming through your schools.

I don’t know if it’s just me, but that looks more like Robert E. Lee:

Dont you remember?

I’ve either uncovered a vast historical conspiracy, or aside from being reformed hippies, the members of Starship were Confederate sympathizers.

Who rides the wrecking ball in two rock guitars?

King Tom

Turning turkey day into cow day

Tomorrow, the Civee and I are planning on being in Columbus for Thanksgiving evening. Neither of us are fans of turkey, and I think we may be doing something different: steak for Thanksgiving.

It’s something I’ve always dreamed of doing.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

King Tom5 Comments

Lost in translation

Despite the declaration on weezer.com that the tracklist of Alone: The Home Recordings Of Rivers Cuomo won’t be published until the album hits the stores, a Japanese media site has made the list public.

From http://www.ro69.jp/news/archive.html?1265, translation available here:

1.Ooh／オー
2.The World We Love So Much ／ザ・ワールド・ウィー・ラヴ・ソー・マッチ※The New Radicalsのソングライター＜Gregg Alexander＞の曲
3.Lemonade／レモネード
4.The Bomb／ザ・ボム　※Ice Cubeのカヴァー
5.Buddy Holly ／バディ・ホリー　※未発表別テイク
6.Chess／チェス
7.Longtime Sunshine　★／ロングタイム・サンシャイン
8.Blast Off!　 ★／ブラスト・オフ！
9.Who You Callin’Bitch?　 ★／フー・ユー・コーリン・ビッチ？
10.Wanda(You’re My Only Love)／ワンダ（ユー・アー・マイ・オンリー・ラヴ）
11.Dude We’re Finally Landing　★／デュード・ウィー・アー・ファイナリー・ランディング
12.Superfriend　★／スーパーフレンド
13.Lover In The Snow／ラヴァー・イン・ザ・ショー
14.Crazy One／クレイジー・ワン
15.This Is The Way／ディス・イズ・ザ・ウェイ
16.Little Diane／リトル・ディアン　※Dionのカヴァー
17.I Wish You Had An Axe Guitar／アイ・ウィッシュ・ユー・ハド・アン・アックス・ギター
18.I Was Made For You／アイ・ワズ・メイド・フォー・ユー

Of course, that all depends on if the google translation is accurate. It could be the list of theme ingredients on the next season of Iron Chef.

It’s a decent list. A few songs that the weezer community already has, but enough new stuff to make the disc interesting.

Aah, who am I kidding? I’ll buy it the day it comes out.

King Tom

Crab if you wanna

While scouting the Internet for any information on the upcoming Rivers Cuomo solo demo CD, I came across a column published today in which an MTV writer plays the metaphorical role of victim of a “loveless relationship” with Cuomo and the rest of Weezer.

I loved Weezer more than any other act alive (except for maybe Beck). Blue and Pinkerton were two of the albums that defined my teenage years, and I still believe that the latter’s squealy pre-emo makes it one of the decade’s most important discs, on par with, say, Radiohead’s OK Computer. (I even wrote a rather embarrassing pseudo-column about this three years ago.) But ever since bassist Matt Sharp split and the band went on hiatus in the summer of ’97, everything changed; the relationship, for all intents and purposes, was over.

The writer details his dissatisfaction with everything that came out after Pinkerton, as well as whines a little about how he only got 13 minutes to interview Rivers a few years ago.

Honestly, I’ve heard this (and similar thinking) before, and I don’t get it. I know that Pat Wilson (the drummer) semi-seriously said “You have to hate us to be a true fan,” but this is ridiculous.

It’s unrealistic to expect people (and bands) to stay the same–Rivers and the rest of the band have changed. The first hiatus (late ’97-2000) changed the makeup of the band and Rivers’ song production styles. And with each album since (and subsequent break from music making), things have changed for the band and the people that make up the band. They still make quality rock (better than anything else out there), but if it’s not your taste, why whine about how the old music was better?

Music (as with most art) is as much a product of the musician’s place in the world as their personality. Pinkerton came from a very negative place and times weren’t pleasant for Rivers or the rest of the band. For the last four years, we’ve been told there’s diplomacy and consensus when it comes to making music. The band members are grown up, and three of the four of them are married. Why would they want to go back to the days when Rivers told them what to play and when? Why would Rivers want to go back to the days of the Good Life?

Broken, beaten-down can’t even get around
without an old-man cane I fall and hit the ground
Shivering in the cold, I’m bitter and alone
…
Excuse the bitchin’ – I shouldn’t complain
I should have no feeling, ‘cuz feeling is pain
as everything I need is denied me
and everything I want is taken away from me
but who do I got to blame?
Nobody but me

I don’t wanna be a old man anymore
It’s been a year or two since I was out on the floor
Shakin’ booty, makin’ sweet love all the night
It’s time I got back to the Good Life

Or as Rivers responded to a fan question two years ago:

What do you say to those people (fans) who say they want another Pinkerton?
—Michael Silvers

I cant control what I write. I have to accept whatever comes. If its not what someone wants to hear, then at least they can agree with me to love Pinkerton and part as friends.

Addendum: The band’s attitude toward its fans is anything but loveless. Over the past few years, Rivers (and the rest of the band) have welcomed fans on stage to play, welcomed them backstage to hang out and given them boatloads of free video and audio content. Yes, we want more, but you could make the argument that we’re spoiled as it is.

King Tom

The best thing ever (of last week)

Last week, while waiting for a movie to start, the Civee and I visited a nearby bookstore to waste some time.

On one of the featured items tables near the front of the store, I noticed a Star Wars Pop Up Book, selling for $30. While I didn’t buy the book, I did take a look and what I saw was pretty damn cool. Each page had multiple, detailed pop-ups, but the best was found by lifting up a flap on a page near the back of the book. Luckily, I was able to capture the moment with my new phone:

It's a trap!

You can’t repel awesomeness of this magnitude!

King Tom

Bret Screwed Bret

Ten years ago today, the course of wrestling changed forever in an arena up in Montreal.

this looks like a quote-shoot-unquote to me

Vince McMahon, owner of the (then) near-bankrupt WWF let one of his star wrestlers, Bret Hart, out of his contract to sign with rival WCW. Hart was the federation champion, with a month left to wrestle for the fed, and was willing to lose the belt to anyone but Shawn Michaels in anyplace but Canada. But McMahon feared WCW announcing that it signed away its champion.

With an injured future savior (Stone Cold Steve Austin) sidelined due to a broken neck, transitioning the title to Michaels was the only way that McMahon saw he could keep his company creatively afloat until Austin’s coronation. So McMahon had Hart lose a scripted match that was supposed to be a draw, effectively kicking Hart to the curb.

Even more genius, McMahon used the negative karma to make himself into an evil foil for the blue-collar Austin when Austin won the belt.

Hart’s time in WCW was forgettable, and he was out of the business within a few years. Austin, who was already one of the industry’s biggest stars, became even bigger and the near-bankrupt WWF bounced back to dominate American wrestling.

While Hart was the center of an excellent storyline earlier that summer, he was slowly losing relevance. By his own admission, he didn’t agree with the direction in which the company was headed. Because Austin was injured, it wasn’t the right time to transition the title to him. And regardless of how McMahon handled the Survivor Series, the WWF needed a credible champion, not some joker like Ken Shamrock.

The ‘Montreal Screwjob’ might not have had a happy ending for Bret Hart, but for Vince McMahon and the WWF, the result was more than worth it.

For an extremely detailed look at what went down in the weeks leading up to the 1997 Survivor Series, check out Dave Meltzer’s recap.

For an excellent look at the big historical picture, check out Scott Keith’s essays King Lear and Lazarus.

King Tom

Just another Tuesday

Tonight is the first Election Night in seven years that I don’t have to work.

I should have celebrated in some significant way, but other than going out to dinner with The Civee, it was pretty much life as usual tonight. But dinner and the company were good.

I enjoyed having the night off for a change. But I have a feeling that I’ll be back at work for this night next year. I actually enjoy it. It’s (now) the one night of the year that I get to work past midnight and then come in the next day after noon.

King Tom