Author: King Tom

King Tom of the Airwaves

The King was on television this morning.

Well, it wasn’t the first time I’ve been on TV, but it was pretty neat to have someone come up to me and say “hey, I saw you on TV!”

The story begins yesterday, after the Civee and I got home from work, I was shoveling some remaining snow and slush out from in front of our car. There was a cameraman from the local NBC affiliate (competitor of the station that was stepsibling to the cable news channel I used to work for) shooting tape of the quickly-melting snow on the streets. The Civee and I DVRed that night’s 11:00 news broadcast to see if they included the video. They didn’t.

So I didn’t think about it until this morning. I walked into the building I work in, and a co-worker, who was crossing the lobby shouted out to me “TOM! YOU WERE ON TV!” A few other co-workers mentioned that they saw me too on the morning nes broadcast. And from what I gather, while no one was paying attention to the content of the news broadcast at the time, all they saw was a few seconds of me shoveling snow.

This isn’t the first time I’ve been on TV or have had people comment about it. But I would like to know why.

What was the story about? Were they critiquing (or making fun of) my form? Were they talking about how a nine-year-old girl could shovel faster than me? (I’ve been sick, you know) Or, rather, were they talking about how my pasty complexion mixes in well with the snow?

Geez, this has made me pretty paranoid.

King Tom1 Comment

What'samatter Babe Are Ya Feelin' Sick?

For the past few days, the Civee and I have been under the weather in more ways than one.

Beginning Friday, central Ohio was hit by a storm which dropped anywhere from 13 to 20 inches of snow on the area. As if the white death wasn’t enough, we’ve been sick.

The Civee has a nasty cough and a lot of congestion. I had a fever which hit 101.9 and has left me dizzy and disoriented (even more disoriented than usual).

Because the rest of my family lives everywhere but Columbus, they’ve been calling throughout the past few days to check on how we’ve been dealing with the snow. When I inform them of our illness, they’ve all passed along advice. Different advice.

My father advised taking a lot of vitamin C. My mother said we should drink hot tea and soup.

But my grandmother had the most interesting advice. She said to take a quarter cup of vinegar, a quarter cup of honey, mix it together and drink a tablespoon of it every six hours. I asked her if this was something she would try and she said yes, and the vinegar is important because it’s supposed to kill the germs in your throat.

I haven’t tried it. But I did think; wouldn’t drinking a can/bottle of beer every hour (or more frequently, depending on the illness) do the same thing?

King Tom

The Leg That Launched A Thousand Pitches

Former Yankees hurler Orlando “El Duque” Hernandez, who has one of the most distinct wind-up/deliveries in baseball today, will have to drastically alter his wind-up for medical reasons. According to the New York Post:

Hernandez has multiple problems with his right foot, notably a bunion issue that causes significant pain on his instep near his big toe. When he brings his right knee toward his face in his standard delivery, Hernandez is forced to take his heel off the ground, which places greater strain on the instep and toe areas. So Hernandez needs to modify his delivery to allow him to keep his heel flat as a way to alleviate pain.

Watching him pitch for the Yankees from 1998-2001 and again in aught-four, I always thought he’d develop hip issues from his delivery. But this is a real shame. It seems like today, 90% of pitchers have the same kind of wind-up/delivery. Hernandez wasn’t a power pitcher, and helped use his delivery to deceive opposing batters, something that helps when the eephus is in your repertiore.

Back in ’98, Hernandez was a sort of folk hero for the Yankees. Escaping from Cuba (regardless of the details of the story), this guy with a different delivery helped the Yankees win championships. His delivery was the even the subject of a commercial (the true stars of which are King Tom favorites David Cone and Luis Sojo):

Actually, there were quite a few of these commercials for the Yankees that summer. Possibly the most awesome of which starred George Steinbrenner (who chose not to use a body-double):

Body Suit Man must have had the day off.

King Tom

It Doesn't Mean What You Think It Means

When I used to work writing for a cable news channel Web site, one of the more interesting parts of my job was writing headlines for news stories. It was one of the areas where I was allowed to get creative. I figured if a headline entertained me, or made me think, people would be more likely to click and read the story.

I would have killed to have this story, from the Washington Post, with what has to be the best.headline.ever:

Skywalkers In Korea Cross Han Solo

update/edit: I’m an idiot. I didn’t notice that this was from last year. But I still think it’s funny.

King Tom

Lost: The Constant[ly Confusing Best Show Ever]

Wow. I don’t understand what happened on tonight’s episode of Lost (The Constant), but whatever it was was freakin’ incredible.

Take your normal island mysteries, a hint of good vs. evil, a flashback that answers a question or two about a main character and a romance that’s enough to turn the King into a regular softie and you have one awesome episode of Lost.
Continue reading “Lost: The Constant[ly Confusing Best Show Ever]” →

King Tom

The Great One Gets Called Out

In a recent interview, current wrestling star John Cena blasts the Great One:

“At one point Rock loved wrestling and wanted to do this all his life. So explain to me why he can’t come back. Simply put it’s because he wants to be an actor and there’s nothing wrong with that.
“He’s very good and very successful. Associating with sports entertainment doesn’t do much for his acting career — I get it. Just don’t f*** me around and tell me that you love this. That’s the only thing that gets me really p***ed off.
-from The Sun

I have to say I actually agree with Cena here. I’m a huge fan of the Rock–the man came from nowhere and carried the WWF on his back for two years as injuries, egomaniacal wrestlers and poorly executed storylines made most of the rest of what the fed was putting on the air unwatchable. The Rock could bring it both in the ring and on the microphone. He certainly has the skills and charisma to be an action hero. And he’s had a much better film career than Hulk Hogan. But has he reallly become the big star that he wants to be?

It’s been tough for wrestling, but the past few years have shown that the WWF/E can survive without The Rock or Stone Cold. But can The Rock really survive without wrestling? Possibly. But it wouldn’t be as entertaining for the audience.

King Tom

A Culinary Tip From The King

Tonight, I was making salmon for dinner. The recipe called for some white wine. We didn’t have any. After searching the fridge, I found half a bottle of Boone’s Farm Apple Blossom wine (the Civee enjoys wine coolers every now and then).

Rather than being a “white” wine, the Boone’s was a shade of green. But it had many of the other critical elements of the wine ingredient, so I used it. And the salmon was pretty tasty, with a hint of sweet apple.

So take it from the King- you can substitute Boone’s for normal wine. But if you’re not in college, you may have a tough time explaning what the bottle of Boone’s is doing in your fridge.

King Tom

Bye-Bye Beardo

The beard that I started six months ago in Canada is gone.

It was fun, but it just got annoying. I was at work the other day, rubbing the side of my face and I thought to myself “I want my face back.” So last night, I ditched the beard. It was fun, and I might go back to it at some time in the future. But for now, I’ll be beard-free for the forseeable future.

Of course, this means I have to go through the drudgery of shaving on a regular basis, one of the reasons that I grew the thing to begin with.

King Tom