Author: King Tom

Dear Daniel, Mommy Doesn't Love You.

If there’s one (for lack of a better word) constant on Lost, it’s main characters with serious daddy issues.   Whether it’s a father stealing a child’s kidney, running off for years on end, or just living life in a drunken haze, fathers on Lost have been villified to no end.

But on tonight’s episode of Lost, The Variable, we met a (again, for lack of a better word) variable to the forumla.  Meet Daniel Faraday.  He’s a thirty-something physicist and professor at Oxford with possible moral and ethical issues when it comes to human experimentation.  He’s travelled through time, likes redheads and long walks through the jungle.  He has possible mental issues (but no one’s perfect).  He wants to make the island world a better place.

Oh, and he has mommy issues.

Continue reading “Dear Daniel, Mommy Doesn't Love You.” →

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Don't Call It A Comeback, Irabu's Been Here For Years

Looks like Hideki Irabu is giving up his life of noodle shop proprietor by day and bar fighter by night.

According to NPB Tracker, the Yankees’ all time leader in wins by a Japanese starting pitcher is considering a comeback:

Nikkan Sports is reporting noted fat toad Hideki Irabu is working out in LA and aiming to resume his career in the US independent leagues some time this season. The article says that he’s played in amateur games and is hitting 90 mph on the gun in his workouts.

I’ve made it no secret that for some reason, I’m a fan of Irabu.  At times, his stuff was above average, and for a few months in ’98, he was the Yankees’ best starting pitcher.

But he had some major attitude issues and when he wasn’t trying, his stuff was all too hittable.  That and a habit of not covering first base led to a trade to Montreal where Yankees GM Brian Cashman must have had some incriminating photos of Expos front office officials to get a few decent players back for Irabu.

Hideki floundered in Montreal and also served as the Rangers’ closer before “retiring,” opening up a noodle shop in LA and another in Japan.

According to the NPB link, he also tried out for Japan’s WBC team this winter.  Looks more like he participated in the tryouts rather than actually made the team.

Still, if all he’s shooting for is another shot in the big leagues, best of luck to him.  If somehow he happens to end up in Columbus pitching for or against the Clippers, I may have to dig one of my two Irabu T-shirts out of the closet.

(Actually, now that I think about it, I may have worn one last summer.  Should I be admitting that in a public forum?)

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Dear Tony, Jack Will Shoot You In The Face. K Thx Bye.

Tony has the upper hand, for now.Last week, during the 1:00 a.m. – 2:00 a.m. hour of Season 7 or 24, Tony’s heel turn was the big surprise.  During tonight’s hour, we saw evil Tony in action, and even more surprising than seeing evil Tony was watching him plot against Jack, and in the final scenes, actually point a gun at and threaten Jack.

Jack Bauer has the symptoms of Mad Cow disease.  His memory may be Swiss Cheese and he may be unable to control even the smallest of bodily functions.  He may not be able to communicate that Tony has betrayed him and the country (yet again).

But one thing is for sure. No matter how much Tony may have a grip on the situation now, Jack Bauer will extract his revenge on Tony Almeida.  Jack Bauer will shoot Tony in the face.  Possibly after incapaciting Tony using his legs.  But Tony’s actions will not go unpunished.

Continue reading “Dear Tony, Jack Will Shoot You In The Face. K Thx Bye.” →

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Some Like It Hoth And Some Sweat When The Heat Is On

Ask a hundred people what they would do if they could travel back in time and you’d get a hundred different answers.

On tonight’s episode of Lost, Some Like it Hoth, we heard what Hurley’s plans are.  And all I have to say is it’s about time someone puts forth a time travel plan that makes sense.

Although I do have to say that I think Hurley was wrong in saying Empire Strikes Back could be improved. Hopefully, he was talking about just improving Return of the Jedi (with the whole “Ewoks suck” comment) and leaving well enough alone with Empire.

But he would also have the power to influence the prequels.  While I don’t have the issues with the prequels that some do, there are some areas that could be improved, and that would really be the advantage of time travel.

As a side note, I was planning on writing about how it would be torture for a Star Wars fan to travel back to the ’70s in 2004 and not have the chance to see Episode III.  But then, Hurley had a few years off the island, so hopefully, he got the chance to catch up on Revenge of the Sith in the inbetween years.

But enough about Star Wars…

Continue reading “Some Like It Hoth And Some Sweat When The Heat Is On” →

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You Can Tune A Piano, But You Cannot…

Something that’s been stuck in my mind the last 24 hours:  Last night, The Civee and I were watching The Office when Michael said he “had a dream where [he] ate a peanut butter and tuna fish sandwich.”

This has disturbed me all day.

Not the idea of a peanut butter and tuna fish sandwich.  Sure, that’s got to be nasty.  But not disturbing.

Rather, it was the use of the phrase “tuna fish.”

We don’t say we eat turkey fowl for Thanksgiving (not that I would).  Nor do we grill steak meat during the summer time.  So why do we say “tuna fish” when referring to that gray stuff that comes in a can?

I have a feeling I will now be fighting this crusade for the rest of my life.

By the way, fresh tuna is much better than anything that comes in a can.  Case in point, this is one of the Civee’s favorite recipes (for someone who didn’t like fish before we got married):

Tuna Sticks in Pepper Sauce

  • 1 tuna steak per person
  • 1 clove garlic
  • 1/2 cup sesame seeds
  • 1 jar roasted red peppers
  • 4 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
  • Pinch of salt

Cut the tuna steak(s) lengthwise, turning each steak into 3-4 “sticks.”

Cover each side of each stick with the sesame seeds.

Place garlic, red peppers  and salt into food processor. Blend until peppers form a sauce.  Add 2 tablespoons of the olive oil and pulse to mix.

Heat a pan on high, adding the remaining olive oil.  Cook the tuna sticks for a minute per side.

Remove sticks from pan, plate and cover with the red pepper sauce.

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Ben Linus Would Rather Be Dead [Is Dead]

I’m sitting here, 20 minutes after the ending of tonight’s episode of Lost, Dead Is Dead, wondering what to say.

As with any episode of Lost featuring Ben or Locke, it was a solid episode.  Throw in some exposition about Ben’s past along with hints at some longtime island mysteries, and you have an awesome episode.

I was on the edge of my seat all night, and before I knew it, this episode was over.  And I couldn’t really think of anything to say about it.  So I’ll start with this:

If, like Ben, at the end, we’re judged by the hairstyles we had earlier in our life, I’m in trouble.

And if you’ve ever seen the Superman curl that I had earlier in life, that’s big trouble.

But enough about me. Back to Lost…

Continue reading “Ben Linus Would Rather Be Dead [Is Dead]” →

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Jonas Hodges. On The Balcony. With The Whiskey Bottle.

Throughout tonight’s episode of 24, I kept on waiting for some action.  More specifically, some action involving Jack Bauer.

Sure, we had Special Agent Larry Fine’s staredown with the Starkwood security team.  And we had Tony sneaking into the bunker with the help of Doug something-or-other (played by the guy who was Hank Jennings).  But the first 40 minutes of tonight’s episode was pretty light while Jack Bauer stood around in FBI headquarters suffering from the early effects of Mad Cow disease.

But then [My Name Is] Jonas Hodges went to go have a little talk with Doug and things picked up considerably.

Continue reading “Jonas Hodges. On The Balcony. With The Whiskey Bottle.” →

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