Category: 24

As I do every Monday night (during the season), I’d like to share some thoughts about 24.

No, not about tonight’s underwhelming episode (although we’ll get to that).  But about 24 in general.  I’ve been watching the show since the beginning hours of Day Two.  I’ve been blogging about Jack’s adventures here at the Kingdom since the first hours of the awesome Day Five.  I like to think I know the show.  I also pay attention to my blog statistics.  I don’t get thousands of visitors each day (more in the 20s or 30s each day), but I get a solid number of people each week who arrive at the Kingdom having searched for something 24-related.  Taking some of these most popular searches reveals a lot about what interests 24 fans.  Here are some of the most popular terms which have brought 24 fans to the Kingdom:

• Jack Bauer stabbed
• Jack hotwire bulldozer
• Jack Bauer screwdriver
• Jack Bauer German Glasses disguise
• Jean Smart Cleavage
• Tony betray Jack
• Jack Bauer Mad Cow
• Brian Hastings Hunchback
• Jonas Hodges
• Jonas Hodges killed a guy on a balcony
• Jonas Hodges killed a guy with a liquor bottle
• Buchanan Yoga
• Charles Logan horny

Quite an interesting list.  Most of these are about Jack and the various ways he’s taken out bad guys or killed their lackeys.  The ones that aren’t about Jack are about other, interesting main characters the show has had over the years.  I can say that I have never gotten Web hit from any of the following (and we’ll only cover those plots from the time I’ve been blogging):

• Wayne Palmer action scene
• Wayne Palmer coma
• President Wayne Palmer
• Chad Lowe convincing villain
• Dumbass teen terrorist
• Dana and rubes
• The IRKian first family
• Janis Gold, effective FBI agent
• Martika and Ike Dubaku romance
• Audrey coma
• Jack Bauer Rain Man

Unlike the previous list, I’ve gotten none (or close to none) Web hits from people searching for these terms (or similar items).  Leading to the conclusion that not only are plotlines such as those on the second list not interesting, but people don’t want to find out more (or read more) about them.  It’s understandable that 24 can’t feature 24 straight hours of Jack running around, killing people with staple guns, circular saws and other items you’d find in a hardware store.  No, Jack is subject to the rules of real life and will get stuck in traffic.

The show needs supporting characters with plotlines to set up Jack, and occasionally, waste time.  The thing is, in more recent seasons, those additional characters haven’t been worth paying attention to.  The early days featured the Palmer family drama (which yes, was tedious in Day 3), compelling stories like the romance, break-up and re-romance of Tony and Michelle, and villains who you actually feared.

These days, the supporting characters are boring (or, as made popular by Kingdom fave Edgar) are killed off all too soon.  The political plots are predictable re-hashes of what we’ve seen before.  And the villains are cookie-cutter stereotypes who don’t even last long enough to get interesting.  The two exceptions- Jon Voight as Jonas Hodges, who was Blofeldian in his evilness and David Anders as, well, he didn’t last long enough to get a nickname, much less have me care about his real name.

I can’t tell you who the villains are this season, except for some dude stuck in an oxygen chamber and his cronies hanging out in a diner.  And I can’t tell you about a non-Jack storyline I care about.  And I wish it weren’t that way.

I’ll continue to watch 24, more out of duty and the promise that Jack might do something awesome once every three or four hours.  But it’s tough.

Now about tonight….

Continue reading “What Makes 24 Fans Tick” →

At least once a season in 24, Jack Bauer will go rogue.  Whether it’s to save a colleague, a family member, or to exact vengeance on a villain in a way the government won’t let him, Jack throws all rules aside and acts as a free agent.  Heaven help those, good or bad, who get in his way.  Usually, Jack’s rogue status lasts a few episodes, by which time, either Jack lets himself be taken into custody or the authorities realize Jack is right and get out of the way.

Well, in Day Eight of 24, Jack Bauer went rogue.  And it lasted all of ten minutes.

Continue reading “Jack Goes Rogue. For Ten Minutes.” →

Pop quiz.  The TV show known as 24 got it’s name because:

(a) There are 24 episodes in each season, mimicking the whole idea of 24 hours in a day, ergo each season takes place over the span of one day.

(b) It’s the number of times Jack Bauer gets stabbed, shot or otherwise maimed each season.

(c) The last 24 minutes of each episode are the only ones worth watching.

If you answered (c), you were right!  You win a year’s supply of turtle wax and one free tax preparation session from Jack Bauer, CPA.

Continue reading “Accidental Stabbing Can’t Stop Jack Bauer” →

If you’re a fan of 24 and you’re anything like me, you tune into the show for one reason: to see Jack Bauer lay the smack down.

We don’t watch for the political or international intrigue (although, in the last few seasons, that’s stretching).

We don’t watch for the latest updates on the messed up lives of CTU employees.

And we don’t watch because Jack Bauer’s behind the steering wheel of a Ford Focus for episodes at a time.

It’s getting to the point where Jack Bauer is like Poochie. And I’d just like to say to the producers of 24 (to paraphrase Homer Simpson):

One, [Jack Bauer] needs to be louder, angrier, and have access to a time machine. Two, whenever [Jack]’s not onscreen, all the other characters should be asking “Where’s [Jack]”?

Because I know with one exception this season, whenever he’s not on screen, I’m asking my TV “Where’s Jack?”

The one exception has been the work the last few weeks of Agent Renee.  She’s like Jack at his season-three era darkest, but even her storyline is taking up too much time.

Poochie, er…Jack’s best scene this episode was his short stint as German arms dealer Hans Gruber (at least that’s what I thought the name was).  Jack proved to be fluent in German, and had some great exchanges with the Russian guy’s flunky.  My favorite exchange was this one:

Continue reading “Jack Bauer As Hans Gruber” →

In past seasons of 24, Jack Bauer has faced a variety of foes, from the presumed dead Victor Drazen and the seemingly hapless but diabolical President Charles Logan to Jonas Hodges, who dared challenge the U.S. President via video conference call.

This season, though, the man who’s shaping up to be Jack’s nemesis is someone who doesn’t quite inspire as much fear as the man who was RoboCop.  Our villain is a businessman with, presumably a scary-sounding Russian name, but a man who is best known as Papa.

Yes, Papa.  Sounds especially menacing if you imagine someone saying it in a baby’s voice.  This is the bad guy (so far) for 24 Day Eight.

I gotta tell you, I’m not that scared.

I think a more compelling bad guy would be Poppie from Seinfeld.

We’ve all seen how he can terrorize New York:

But enough about how this season could be better…

Continue reading “The Villain for 24 Day Eight: Papa” →