After watching these last two frustrating (yet somehow compelling) hours of 24, all I have to say is if security really is that bad at the White House, we’re all screwed.
Category: 24
beep…boop…beep.
Help–Jack Bauer's Brain Is Missing!
Throughout his career as a government agent, Jack Bauer has a history of being one step ahead of everyone else. Bad guys, good guys, idiot family members, Jack is portrayed as the sharpest knife in the drawer that is the 24-verse. As a viewer, it’s fun- cheering for the guy who is always right and always gets things done.
But tonight, I have to admit my faith in Jack was broken. True, Jack’s pursuit of Ike and the information to take down the conspiracy achieved their goals, but he made two missteps along the way that resulted in me shouting at the TV, questioning whether Jack was out of his mind.
First, after pulling Ike’s seemingly lifeless body out of a flaming car, Jack left Ike there to lay on the sidewalk while he helped Special Agent Renee attempt to save Martika.
Not that I have anything against saving the life of someone who helped you nail the bad guy, but I’ve watched way too much TV to expect Ike to still be laying there when Jack is done trying to save Martika.
Secondly, shortly after procuring a chip from Ike’s body, Jack proceeds to hand said MacGuffin over to a random police officer who just so happened to be standing by a helicopter. Now, that chip contained the names and information on all of the government agents involved in the conspiracy, right? Then why would Jack hand that over to some random police officer?
Luckily, neither of these missteps came back to bite Jack in the ass. Hopefully, Jack’s brain was catching up on its sleep this episode and his body was on autopilot. Jack will be back to normal next week (I hope).
Despite Jack’s questionable decisions, the whole pursuit of Ike and retrieval of the microchip is over. But the name of the game is 24, not 9, and there’s more to talk about.
Jack Bauer Will Break Your Heart
First, just a little something I want to get out of the way. From January 19 of this year:
Speaking of the FBI, Special Agent Jeanene’s associate (good ol’ whatshisname) is really irritating, even moreso than her. I’m guessing he’s the mole. Because of the hair grease. Why the hair grease? Well, the main terrorist (the guy who Jack’s boss reported to) also used a bit too much hair grease this morning. So did one of the evil secret service agents. Remember back in season 1 how all the good guys used Macs and the bad guys used PCs? Well, I’m calling it now. Bad guys, hair grease. Good guys, natural and fluffy.
I’m glad that I actually called a mole right one of these seasons. Even though “good ol’ whatshisname” since been re-named on this blog as Special Agent Brylcreem, my disdain for him and his whiny ways have not changed. I suppose that serves notice to Special Agent The Bowler as well, because she remains just as annoying. Still, this whole episode just reinforced one fact:
Relationship Issues
Tonight on 24, we learned the main bad guy is having issues with his girlfriend, who thinks he’s an importer/exporter who is extremely devoted to his work.
The FBI agent who’s [most likely in the end] a good guy and smitten with his female co-worker is frustrated by the fact that each minute she’s getting more and more like Jack Bauer and less like the bright-eyed by-the-book FBI agent he fell in love with all those years ago.
In the White House, the president is showing some backbone by refusing to negotiate with the terrorists who have kidnapped the first husband. Meanwhile, upstairs in President Heaven, President David Palmer is looking down on all this and thinking to himself…
Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before
So on tonight’s episode of 24 (Day 7: 2:00 p.m. – 3:00 p.m.), an industrial plant in a small town is threatened. A remote computer controls the release of toxic gas, but when that system is compromised, the buildup of said gas threatens to explode, putting that town in danger. Only the brave efforts of one man, who must sacrifice himself to save the day by throwing the manual release lever can save the day…
King Size Homer looks better in a mu-mu than Jack Bauer would.
The First Husband Hulks Up
I’ve noticed a regular occurence throughout my years of watching of 24–one hour is a bit slow, setting things up. I think the hour is a disappointment, even if it’s full of exposition and witty one-liners (“I’m a stay at home mom”). Then all of a sudden, after the episode, as I watch the previews, my mind is blown and I think the next week can redeem the show I just watched.
This week was one of those weeks.
To be honest, this hour had its moments. Chlöe and Bill rescuing the redhead. Jack and Tony taking down both groups of bad guys. The reveal of Henderson (RoboCop) being behind Tony’s reseurrection. And the first husband hulking up out of his drug-induced paralysis to take down the evil secret service agent (or, more accurately, take him over the railing and onto the table below, using the evil agent’s body to break his fall). Actually, with all due respect to Jack, that was the moment of this episode- making the first husband’s storyline worthwhile.
The rest of the hour seemed like it was sitting around and talking. The FBI is still boring and full of unsympathetic characters (the one FBI agent with any likability whatsoever is out in the field with Jack). The White House drama is okay, but to be honest, we’ve heard it all in some form of another over the past six years. And if the cabinet invokes the Twenty-Fifth Amendment for a third time on this show, I’m going to walk away.
Overall, this season is average, but I’m waiting for it to go somewhere. Am I alone?
I'd Like To Do A Jack Bauer On My Cable Box
For some reason, my cable box decided to go out in the middle of tonight’s 24. I missed (what I’m guessing was) minutes 5-25 of tonight’s show. While I’m not entirely happy with this, all I have to say is if this happens Wednesday night, there will be hell to pay.
That being said, from what I was able to watch:
Not enough Jack tonight.
Too much FBI. I don’t care about them. Their holier-than-thou attitude makes them very unsympathetic. And Special Agent Jeanene Garafolo still hasn’t grown on me. Also, please tell me which alternate universe 24 exists in where the federal government can respond to alleged civil rights violations in five seconds flat while not making any headway into solving the identities of those behind the terror plot.
Speaking of the FBI, Special Agent Jeanene’s associate (good ol’ whatshisname) is really irritating, even moreso than her. I’m guessing he’s the mole. Because of the hair grease. Why the hair grease? Well, the main terrorist (the guy who Jack’s boss reported to) also used a bit too much hair grease this morning. So did one of the evil secret service agents. Remember back in season 1 how all the good guys used Macs and the bad guys used PCs? Well, I’m calling it now. Bad guys, hair grease. Good guys, natural and fluffy.
I was also disappointed in the paucity of Bill and Chlöe (aka Shadow CTU). Were they doing anything at all this hour? Was it their lunch break?
Speaking of CTU, I know the creators really wanted to switch things up this year, but killing CTU was a bad decision. It was a great set and added a lot to the story. Now, we are to believe the FBI can save the day when it looks like all their agents are filing their TPS reports and getting ready for their 3:30 meeting the corporate.
One more thing. The ending would have been far more shocking had Lost not already done the same thing. That reminds me. Only two more days.
This Is A Song About A Superhero Named Tony
About twenty years ago, Randy “Macho Man” Savage and Hulk Hogan teamed up to form the Mega Powers, a union that gave fans what they wanted- the ultimate good guy wrestling tag team. The Mega Powers decimated everyone in their way, before imploding and turning on each other.
Last night on the third and fourth hours of the seventh longest day of Jack Bauer’s life, we found out Tony Almeida (who cheated death) wasn’t evil, but “undercover.” Jack busted Tony out of FBI custody, learned Tony was working with Chlöe and Bill Buchanan and teamed up, forming with Tony the 24-universe equivalend of the Mega Powers.
Combine that with the return of Jack Bauer’s man purse (or the Jack Sack, if you will) and you have the beginnings of what could be a turnaround for the fortunes of 24.
I’m not saying all is forgiven. There’s a lot not to like this season. To wit:
- Jeaneane Garafolo serving no purpose on the show other than to rip off Chlöe.
- That FBI guy who says “we’re not CTU, we’re the FBI and we follow the law” every other scene.
- The neurotic First Husband.
- The fact that everyone in the government, including the Attorney General and commandant of the Merchant Marines are moles.
- This nebulous link between the Sangala warlords and the evil terrorist organization determined to rule the world that’s causing so much havoc this season.
All that said, while this season has opened much slower than last season, it has a better foundation. And the Mega Powers’ escape from the FBI was pretty cool.
Yet Another Long Day For Jack Bauer
So I caught the first two hours of Day 7 of 24 last night, and while I’m not doing cartwheels in the hope that it will be a great season, I’m hopeful because it seems better than last season. So far.
Day 6 opened strong, with Jack killing Curtis and a nuclear bomb going off in suburban L.A. That wasn’t the only bomb for the season–the day quickly went downhill, featuring Jack teaming up with Rain Main to hunt the terrorists, going up against his father and being a witness to the killing of Charles Logan, one of the best characters on the show.
This season so far is more grounded, but it has some problems:
- CTU is no more.
- The First Husband is a psycho.
- Once again, there are moles all over the place.
- Tony Almeida is not only alive, but (seemingly) evil.
I can do with the first. But I’m getting tired of moles in every government classification from vice president on the way down to postal carrier. I’m sick of crazy relatives of powerful political figures. And like Jack, I don’t want to believe Tony is bad.
Still, it’s nice to see Jack in action and sticking it to a Congressional committee. Only time will tell if this season can save the show.
Racing Against the Clock
Dammit…I hope I’m not late with this.
Happy Jack Bauer Appreciation Day, everybody!
True, 24 was worse than lackluster last season, but Jack Bauer remains among the greatest of American heroes. For all those of you who like to speak in alternating whispers and shouts, commandeer random vehicles or give your word as a regular negotiating tactic, today is the day for you.
To read some of my views on the best (and worst) of Bauer, click here.